~~~

Hello! I guess I'm just stupid. Sent a message thinking that she wouldn't replied and ended up she did. But when she replied, I don't dare to read the message because I know the content would not be something I want to see. Hence I choose not to read it. Hahaha! Living in a self denial world now. Somehow I just know what the reply would be. I guess I no need to read it I would know the reply too.

Hmm... Recently there are a lot of changes that happens in me and everyone finds it strange too. So maybe I should explain? LOL! WHY SHOULD I? hahahah!

Ok! Let's start with the first one. "Why nowadays you are so happy in the mood?" Well... People close to me (you know who yourself is) might know the reason behind every changes in me. So for those who don't know here is the time.

Why am I so happy? Because I'm trying to cover up every unhappy past thoughts with my laughter. I might be laughing out loud but deep down in my heart is bleeding like running water from the tap. So people please understand if you happens to find me behaving like an idiot.

Why the sudden taking up reading?

Hmm... Alright, to be honest. At first reading wasn't something I would like and I even hate to step into library unless I'm going there to study. So what happened? Haha! Not sure. Maybe it was because in the past she reads a lot and I started to take up reading because of her I guess. That's what my heart is telling me. But now reading is like a drug to me, I can't live without a book and it prevent me from thinking a lot too.

Why the suddenly intake of cheese and oyster?

hahahah! Well... This question is obvious I guess. Haha!

OKOK! Enough of the why. Haha!

Anyway, there are much more changes from what all the people told me but well, this a just some forms of action that are trying to hide the past of me.

Anyway, only in front of my cousins I can really behaves how I want and only they will accept who I am and protect me from all sort of harms.

Can't really get into a relationship now because somehow I'm still holding on to the past. Sorry Pei San and sorry for being harsh to you because I really didn't want you to wait for me. It's not fair to you if I'm only going into a relationship with you because of getting over her. Sorry! Hope you understand. We are still friends but no more than friends. :)

Alright! Gotta go! Reading time!!!!!

I'm Back!

Hello! I'm back after so long. It have been a long time since I last blogged. Wow! It's kinda of freaking long I guess.

Why is that so? Because I was enlisted. For the past 3 weeks I was plainly inside the camp, doing PT (Physical Training) and stuffs. Training to be fit, fitter and fittest. LOL!

Hmm... Not sure why, but my physical and mental outlook change. Mindset and stuffs change too. LOL! I wonder why. LOL! Not bad. Giving myself a good clap! Haha!

Alright. Nothing more to write already. Gotta go. See ya!

BOOK IN!

Today is Terry's book in day. Accompanied him in to Tekong together with Jun Chong and Chun How. Had lunch before going in. Hmm... Tekong had changed so much since that time I went and it really change a lot.

The bunk are also not bad but too bad I don't get the chance to stay there and actually I don't get the chance also never mind at least I no need to travel so far just to book in. Make sense? Not bad not bad.

Overall not bad. Enjoyed though although the tekong stuff took us plenty of time. We were all beat up after that. Haha! But at least Terry won't be alone because we are there rooting for him. He seems happier.

The only thing I can say is cherish.

Follow your heart, your feeling and you will know what you want.

Wonder why.

Hello. Waking up so early in the morning. Wanted to sleep in later but somehow I just can't go back to sleep. Have problem sleeping last night too. Don't worry I'm fine. :)

Sometimes I have been wondering that this phrase once bitten twice shy is quite true. I haven't been lying since that time but I guess once bitten twice shy stuffs is quite true as someone doesn't believe in whatever I say. I don't find the point in lying anymore but still...

Had a tiff and things went odd. Everything was so nice until that day. I don't understand why too. The changes are so huge that I totally can't grasp it. But it's ok and I'm fine.

I guess I understand why though. By the thought but it's ok.

2nd Post of the day.

People, places and things sure brings back a lot of memories. Memories that brings back happiness, sadness or perhaps even anger however still it's a piece of your life. Everyone have to go through up and down in their life that's why it's call life. You have experience stuffs to make you grow.

Perhaps in life there will be regrets but still life still goes on. When it's regret, work things out ensure that you won't regret it the second time. If you lose something, then go get it back. Everything in your life does not come by just because they have to, instead you are the one that are unknowingly getting them. You choose what to hold on to and what to let go. If you think you should be holding something and it's beyond your grasp, fight for it, work things out to go for. If you believe in that something, fight for it and don't lose the belief.

Wondering why am I saying all those stuffs right? It's just a thought for the moment that happens when I'm at the playground. Nowadays, sitting at the playground became my interest, it's my must do stuff everyday I guess. Peaceful and sound so calm.

I've the feeling of going to East Coast Park tomorrow. I push off everything tomorrow. I'm going to travel there by bus tomorrow. Wondering when was the last time I went there to relax and sort out thoughts. It seems like I have a lot of stuffs to sort out.

Turning in. Goodnight.

If only she will be there once more.

~~~

Hello! I'm back and currently using my bro's new laptop to blog. My com is not spoiled just that I was using his com to play battlefield and now I don't feel like playing already so come back blog.

Well... Hmm... Things don't seems to be happening the way I want it to be. When you have everything planned and ended up people are destroying it. What's the point? Plans are something for people to destroy at the end of the day. Cool right? LOL! Anyway, it doesnt matter already. Giving up hope. Not the Hope in the Pandora ar. LOL! I should have know everything from the start that it's not going to work at all.

Well... Anyway, it doesn't matter at all. Hmm...

Alright, last night went to celebrate Terry's birthday and also the farewell dinner for him. He is going to NS in 2 days time and we are going to celebrate it with him. Went to eat in Soup Restaurant the food there not that nice as compared to the time I went to eat during mother's day. But still overall not bad.

I can only said that Terry is super rich. He was actually intending to treat everyone of us but of course ended up we didn't let him pay. The process of asking him to take the money was so long that I'm so lazy to type out but ended up we are still able to force him to take the money. So not bad.

Went to watch smurf after that, a lot of people was saying that that show not bad but ended up it's not bad but very bad. I almost slept in the cinema. It's too draggy and not that nice some more and one more thing. I watched 3D. That's even worse.

Anyway, still not bad. After all Terry enjoyed. That's the motive. Alright, Today's weather is not bad, I think I should go for a jog. Since my illness I haven't been jogging. Today is a must to jog. A MUST!

My cough came back again. So irritating. It's getting on my nerve. Feel like pulling the whole lung out.

Alright. I'm going to jog already. This weather really not bad. Alright gotta go.

Just hope that things will goes the way I want it to be in the final week.

All the best!

...

Hmm... Heard another problems again. I just heard from my friend that she had been having a cold war her bf and it have last for a week already. That's like so long. COLD WAR and I totally hate that. It's not good to have a cold war at all.

I was asking people to cherish their relationships before it's too and they are telling me they hope and stuffs. Like they don't even bother. So why the hell do you wanna get into a relationship if you don't wanna cherish it. Just a companionship? Hais...

Anyway, just got back from the playground again. That is the only place that I can keep my mind out of anything and think. I read again and I'm completing the book soon. Good good.

For some reason, I'm happy. I don't know why. :) Or perhaps I know why? Haha!

It's like catching a lightning the chances of finding someone like you.

It's one in a million the chances of feeling the way we do.

Hence, cherish it before it's really too late.

Hmm...

Hello! It's about 0305 in the morning. Wondering what am I doing so early in the morning? Well, it's suppose to be what am I doing so late at night.

Actually, I just came back from meeting that usual bunch of friends. Went to play monopoly and have supper. I'm surprisingly not tired. First time, after coming back from supper and I'm still so energetic. Lol!

This afternoon, went out with Terry to go shopping. Bought some clothes and a slipper. Someone said that I wear the slipper very ah peh so bought a slipper that don't look that ah peh. Lol!

I was so tempted to buy the blueberries when I saw it in cold storage. Ended up I didn't buy because afraid that no one wanna eat.

Oh oh! While playing the card, we were sitting outside the mac and there it says no smoking area but the smoking area is just beside the non smoking area. What's the different? We are still being a passive smokers. No point putting smoking or non smoking area. It's super pointless.

Alright. I'm going to read books to make myself tired. :D. Goodnight!

Weird

This afternoon went over to JP to meet Christina and Richmond. Actually was there to get something from Christina. But meet way something weird happened, for some reason they... quarreled? I don't really know when they quarreled. When I saw them they were still normal until halfway through the walk in JP and they become like this. Like Richmond was storming the front and Christina was walking at the back. So the three of us was like walking in a straight line with Richmond far in front, I'm in center and Christina at the back. Weird right?

Anyway, after dinner. Richmond was like hurrying to go home and I don't understand why. He got his stuffs and left very fast. I am not sure what had happened he just walk so fast that even not waiting for us or perhaps his girlfriend, Christina and board the train and leave for home. Wow. I wouldn't do that. That was like so..... Anyway, just weird. If I wasn't there, means Christina would be left alone over there? OMG! And she actually said that she was used to it. He even texted her to ask her to shut up when she is unknown of what happened.

That's so weird. I asked him to cherish her. But he told me all those nonsense which forever I don't understand.

Guys! Cherish the one with you now and tolerate her. You love her for who she is and same goes for her. I wished to cherish mine too but I realised this too late. Your's still not late. Cherished it before it's too late. Don't be like me. Regret whatever I had done. :)

~~~

Met up with Chun How and Terry for dinner, after that proceed to Terry's house there to play game. Playing with two of them forever won't win. It's like 2 against 1. So yeah! Didn't win at all.

While walking back, bypassed the playground again. Went over to sit down at the bench. The breeze was so cooling that I sat there and read the last book of Percy Jackson in my iPhone. It was so cooling, wind blow and not much of people over there. Quietness fills and the scent of the plants giving off oxygen. Relaxing and cooling. Just like reading outside the backyard of a house.

Read till 10 plus then I leave for home. Calm~ Relax~ State of mind I have now.

OH! By the way, my cough is cured. No longer coughing. Promised that I will get it recover before she comes back and I really done it. Haha!

Gotta go! Continue with the book. Hope she's doing well. :)

Missing Someone, Something, Somewhere.

...

There are so much things in the world that were unpredictable. Things that you think it will last won't last. Same goes for things that you think that it won't last actually lasted. What do I mean by this? Well, there are of a lot of examples that can describe what I'm saying.

Too many issues happened that are not within my means to interfere or perhaps, I don't even have the rights to interfere. I cared but I don't get the reason at all. I want to know everything but for some reason I don't and I can't.

~~~

Last night sitting beside the playground, looking at the kids playing in the playground, happy laughs and the excitement while playing. When was the last time I have this feelings? When? Can't really remember. Sat there for quite sometime until the time for dinner.

~~~

There are some happy stuffs that happened in between the period of course. Perhaps quite a number. Too lazy to type out but yeah.

Oh! She fly over to Bali already, I guessed she must have reached. Hope she enjoy well and take good care of herself. :)

Sad, Bad and Guilty

Today, I got some announcement from her and I'm totally sad. I just didn't expect that things will turn out this way. For some reason, I just feel another emptiness in me.

When I see him, I feel so bad. Feel so so bad and it just seems like everyone is plotting something against him and he is the only one that is unknown about everything. It's not like he is totally that bad, he is always there when we need him but why does things have to turn out this way? I have to urge to tell him everything. I know how it feels to have everyone being normal to him and when he is not there they were plotting or planning something. I want to tell him but somehow I just can't. I just can't bring myself to say it out.

Looking at him, still showing concern to us really make me feel guilty of not telling him. But for some reason I just can't. It's just like you are looking left and right simultaneously. I just have the feeling that I am betraying him. Why is it that nobody cares?

I wish I would have someone who can guard me, someone like Athena guiding her daughter Annabeth or Poseidon guiding his son Percy. I wish I have the oracle here to tell me the prophecy. What should I do? I'm just trapped in the middle.

I wish I have a device to change people's mind. What can I do? What should I do?

Another emptiness feeling. Filling up. I guess 2/3 of my heart is empty now. Who is going to take away the remaining 1/3?

I guess I can't sleep again tonight. Who can I turn to? There's no one I can trust now. Even the only one is already sleeping.

May god bless me. Bless him. Bless everyone I love.

I going to try turning in now. Don't really feel good now. I just want all my happiness back. All! Everything!!!!

Pondering.

Just wondering if I should have say it? Or should I just not tell? Is it a mistake? Just can't stop wondering.

It's so hard to believe in something when you have already know the fact and people are still telling you the opposite results. I wanna try to listen to your stories but the fact that I saw and the inner me is telling me that they are all lies and it's so hard to convince myself that it's a fact.

Action speaks louder than words and that's the only think I can say. If you were to tell the me the truth now then maybe I won't be feeling this way.

I need to sort out this. I need a jog. Please illness please go away.

~~~

Apart from that, I think that I'm quite clumsy recently. Getting hurt there and cutting myself here. Was baking and I cut myself TWICE. Stupid clumsy me.

The results turns out good and not bad. Kinda proud of myself but I spoiled my mum electronic whisk. Actually she did it indirectly. Haha! Might be going to get a new electronic whisker soon.

Alright. Recently kinda happy other than the stuffs above making me ponder. Yup!

I'm reading so fast and I'm proud too. This is the first time that I spend 1 day finishing up a book about 250+ pages. LOL! Wow, reading using a kindle really speed things up. Oh! Kindle, Amazon Kindle. Reading Percy Jackson series. She lend it to me. Haha!

After when I'm done with Percy Jackson Series, I'm going to research on all the Greek God Stories. Wahaha!

Alright. Going to take my brunch now.

Hope that you didnt get yourself drunk last night.

Sick~

Hi all! I'm sick! LOL! Cough, sore throat, fever and down with a little bit of flu. LOL! Wont die so should be alright.

Recently there are a lot of things that happened, I can't post it here, kinda of private and personal. I hope this pass and let everything be in peace.

I suddenly dont like a particular someone. Hmm... Just that particular someone that I doesnt like now. Hmm... How to say? I also dont know. Long long story I guess.

Hmm... Recently kinda of happy? LOL! Why? Another long story too. LOl! But I'm just particularly happy yesterday? LOl!

Alright. I'm going to IMM now. LOL! Going to bath and leave house. LOL! See ya!

Once Again Happy!

Last night was quite a nice night for me. Enjoyed.

I'm happy too. In fact more than happy. Met her for dinner at teppanyaki over at jurong point. Was searching and looking for some materials but somehow there isnt any that I like and was looking for. So didnt manage to get any.

Yesterday plan was to make her happy because these few days she dont seems to be in the right mood. So yeah, I didnt mean to book the tickets for the movie without discussing with her. I just try my luck and hopefully she dont finds it impulsive. Haha.

Anyway, in the movie, seeing her laugh till so happy makes me happy too. It have been a long time since I see her laugh like this. :D hope to see her laughter everyday.

Although I'm not the one that make her laugh but at least she laugh. OH! She said that she wants to eat more of my cakes! Haha!

She must be still sleeping. Reached home so late just because she was gossiping with huixian and toh hong. Haha! Just hope that she have enough rest.

Just hope that this will be the last time you say thank you to me. :)

Happy Day Today.

Or it's suppose to be called yesterday? LOL!

Because she's unhappy, so I made a so called cake for her. Motive? To make her happy. So was asking everyone to try before letting her have it. I want her to have the best of my masterpiece.

But before I was able to do that, she was already tasting it. But she said it was nice and dont mind to have a second serving. Haha! Happy to the max.

Although I know that she is still unhappy and only a cake wont make her happy. But still I hope that she is alright and happy. There might be post that make you unhappy and I apologise but still, I'm sorry. Cheer up and get better! :)

Don't think about anything.

It's the past and let it pass.

Worried!

Hi! I saw a :( face on her facebook and I'm so worried and wondering what happen to her. But I dont know what I just dont have the courage to text her how is she doing and what happen to her.

Even if I were to text her will she tell me the answer? I really hope that she is alright. Really hope so.

Hope that you are fine.

I didnt text because I'm just a coward.

Please be fine and if it's about me then maybe stop thinking about it.

Wish you all the best.

Sad

I thought everything I heard was true and I choose to believe but ended up it was something made up.

Total sadness fills me in. Sometimes I just have the feeling of picking up the phone and sending "I Miss You" to you.

Wonder if this time round was real?

Today, went to meet Sharon for her opening stuffs then after that went to look for something. Nothing to much to shop, she was feeling sick so asked her to go home and rest.

I went to jog after going home. Woo... Longest jog of the week I guess. I jog to lakeside to look for Sharon and she told me that she would be there. I jog there not because she's there, because it was my usual route. So today stop there for a pit stop.

After that continue to jog to boon lay. Wow! Long jog! Last time used to did that until recently. Today was the first time that I jog so long. Gotta compensate to the other days when I didn't jog.

Today's long jog were to clear my mind and calm myself. Hmm... 2 hours jog today was cool and I sweat damn lot. LOL!

While on the way home, my leg was so wobbly that I almost fell into the drain. After that a bicycle came at me directly and I doesnt have enough strength to dodge and I was knock down. Haha! Clumsy me. I dont blame that cyclist. I was at blame for not having enough reaction time to dodge that when I suppose to have.

After that, walked home and I saw something wriggle on the of the tree and was thinking what was it. Looked up and I saw a snake. Shocked me. I was like jumped and almost fall back. LOl! Yes it's a snake! Haha! Super scary. Haha! I faster run away in case that snake attacks me. Haha!

~~~

This few days I have been trying to calm myself down and stop thinking. Sorting out every feeling, every emotions and base on what I see and what I receive I tried sort it out. The result of what I should do is the same.

I have been happy doing something and yet unhappy at the same times. Thinking... Who am I? What am I?

Hearing what someone said really makes me happy and wishing that that was real but in fact are always cruel.

Alright, I guess that's all for today. Tomorrow's will be a shocking news to see. Look out! LOL!

I thought I am.

I thought that I'm alright but actually I'm not. I thought after all those constant running my mind would have calmed down and trying to move forward but in fact I'm just running constantly at the same spot. I've tried to step out of it but it seems like the treadmill is not stopping for me to get down.

I wasnt feeling good that I heard that and I was shivering from head to toe when I sees it. Damn. I should be alright but why am I not?

I'm receiving something so fake and putting my hope high when I notice that everything was so fake that it just falls from heaven to hell.

I guess this are just my wishful thinking.

That's why I say, Men Love Bitches and Women Love Asshole Bastard. There are actually no Man that love a Woman and a Woman that love a Man.

I'm forgetting it. Stop coming in.

Calm and Ready

Woo~~~ I've spend a week to calm myself down. I'm constantly taking my drugs and I have been controlling myself and restraining myself from a lot of things. It should have calm down and really calm down.

I'm proud of myself. Although the prey hasn't change but it will be a harder target now. The doc said that I'm ready to go for it. So I shall make my move soon.

Of course at the same time I'm going to let nature take it's course though.

Hmm... Kim Tian! You are up for it. Go for it and believe in yourself and you will reached your target in no time!

All the best!

~~~

Hello blog! Do you know how hurtful it is to have hurt someone you love and care so deeply?

I tell you, it is so hurtful that every single seconds I will be thinking how is she feeling? Is she alright? Is she able to recover from that? I'm so worried. I know that I shouldnt have posted that it was just on an impulse. I dont know but I really didnt know that it will hurt that much.

Anyway, now I have already become the bad guy then just let me handle all the despise and stuffs.

I'm sorry. Sorry for hurting you, seeing you this way hurt me too. Sorry!

I'm sorry for hurting you.

Gultiness

I'm in total guiltiness. I dont know what more can I do or can I say. I just feel so bad inside out. I wanna make her feel better but in fact I'm making it worse. What should I do? I dont wanna hurt her my I hurt it.

I'm feeling totally bad now. What can I do to salvage this? I want her to be happy. I want her to be back to normal. I want her to be just the way she is.

I'm so sorry for everything. I just want you to be happy that's all. I will protect you from now on. I dont want you to shed a drop of tears anymore.

Its Still Hurting

Oh My God! Just when I thought that things are getting better a more shocking news shot me. Disappointment after disappointment is what I got.

I'm super hurt now and I want to forget it but I just can't. What am I suppose to do? I want my life to be back to normal, to back to how it use to be.

I wish that I have a time machine and I could change time and stuffs all back to how I wish it could be.

I wish that I could let go, but I know that I still love her. I know she don't but I still can't help it.

If things were to get back to normal,

I promise that I will cherish it more than how it used to be.

I love you!

Birthday!

Today is my birthday and yeah, this year birthday wasn't anything happy as compared to the past 3 years. Because this year I wasn't able to celebrate my birthday with the one I love.

Was hoping that this morning I will wake up and really find a big box at the living room and when I open up the box I find her inside. Haha! *I know that's stupid but yeah*

Or perhaps the breaking up was a hoax for my birthday celebration and she will come hugging me saying that she broke up with me because of my birthday surprises. *Haha! I know it's stupid and people will be angry when they heard that but for now I really hope this happen* LOL!

Hmm... Dont really have plan today but yeah also dont really have stuffs for me to look forward to.

Only one present I want this year,

is the only precious gem that I used to have.

If once again I could own it,

I promised I will cherish till the end.

Missing Her.

Why can't I be like Jerine? So strong hearted and let it go.

Always thinking about her and I just can't bear to let go. I know that it's impossible and this is the first time that I'm doing something or going for something which I don't have confidence in.

Trying all sort of things not to do but I just can't. I know that she's no longer my girlfriend. But I still can't help it but to worry about her. Her gastric pain, she herself walking home and more and more. Anything that will let me worry.

She went to batam and I'm here worrying about her weather will she have seasick, is she alright over there and stuffs.

I know its mission impossible and I am trying to tell myself that it's possible. Why am I so stupid?

I need a run now to calm myself. I hope she's alright there and wont get sick. Take care my love and all the best!

How I wish I got to see you tomorrow, like the past 2 years!

Missing you!

~~~

Hais... Woke up with a very vex feeling again. Why is this so? Tomorrow is my birthday but no seems to have anything to look forward towards. Why do I have so many thing to think of? Why do I have to consider so much factors? Why is it that even though I know what is the result and I'm still insist on trying?

Dont have anything that I want now, how I wish that tomorrow there will be a big box outside my house and she's inside. I was thinking that it's stupid but right now this is what I want.

I need some confidence boost. Just someone that will give me words of courage and encourage me to march forward.

There are so many thing in my mind now. So many things that it's choking up my brain and not allowing it to think about other stuffs.

Trying to let go but at the same time holding on to it. Today she went to batam, knowing that make me miss her. I know I'm not suppose to but how? Can I do it? I'm worried that she will have sea sick because the weather. I'm worried about her being sick over there because it's not that hygiene. I want to stop all those thoughts but I cant.

If birthday wish are really come true, then the only wish this year is Wishing that she will come back to me.

All I want for birthday this year is you

ONCE AGAIN I'M BACK!

Once again I'm back to blogging and in between this period of time there are a lot of things that have happened. I seldom blog because I was keeping a diary hence blogging became less often for me.

Everything happy have ended and now I'm searching for a new happiness. Broke off. I'm quite sad and try to make things work out but it seems not working at all. I thought stuffs that I done could be enough to make her regain the feeling but in fact it backfired.

Whatever I did, hoping that she will at least feel touched or something but ended up it seems like it's making it worse.

Yesterday after a long run, it seems like things kinda have calm down in my heart but of course the emptiness would not go away just because of a run. I'm trying to get over with it and I know it takes time.

Always hoping that we would get back together but still I know in her heart there isnt any place for me anymore. She made it so clearly that she isnt going to come back to me and her peer are also objecting her getting back together with me.

Even though I know that if we were to get back together, things would have different but why isnt her and anyone trusting me? I know that I have broke her heart a number of times and I know that it's hard for her to trust me, but I still want her to trust me this last time. I know I'm selfish to make her trust me and let her have the pressure of being control again. However I just know that things would be different and better.

She just gave me the feeling that I want to protect her from now till the end. The first person that I ever fall so deeply with. The first person who gave me the feeling of patching back so badly. But still I know it's impossible.

Even though impossible I'm still insist of trying. How? Looking at all the blog post and stuffs really make me happy and how I wish we went back to how it use to be.

All the best to me and her. Although I cant forget but still I hope she's well. She's just a precious gem that I will never find it again. :'(

~~~

Why am I so naive? Hoping for something that is already impossible. Not sure if it's impossible but at least I'm trying and it still seems like it's not working at all. How do I make impossible to possible. Hais...

LOVE MAKE ONE GOES MAD!

Love can really make one goes mad and seriously mad. Hmm... Today knowing that she will go other place straight after tuition but still at the same time I was hoping that she will head home first. Instead of taking bus home today I walked home, and taking the route that she commonly used when going home and just hoping that she will appear walking home.

When I'm reaching the overhead bridge, just hope that she will alight from the bus stopping at the bus stop and walk up the overhead bridge. Despite knowing the answer but still hoping that she will be there.

Well, I know this is stupid but yeah what to do? Although it's not enough to just see her for a moment but the thoughts of seeing her can make me happy.

Recently she doesnt seems to have the time because her niece is back. Four months, I have to endure this for four months. Besides her niece, there's still her friends and her tuition. There are hardly times for me other than weekdays going over to her house. That's already enough for me though.

Some times I really hope for the times when we were still studying when she dont have her tuition job and we can go out anytime and anywhere.

As a relationship gets longer, the importance and the time you want to spend with them drops I guess. Hence maybe because of these, things were taken for granted.

Well, things changed, same goes for human.

~Sometimes~

Sometimes I just hope that the worries is not there. Maybe just shouldn't worry about anything. Anything and whatever things it should be, just not going to worry.

Sometimes I just wish that I'm placed at the priority.

Sometimes I really hope to be the most important one.

Sometimes I hope that I would be missed.

Sometimes I really wish that someone would be very happy to see me.

Sometimes, just for a moment I wish that someone would fall in love madly with me.

There are so many sometimes, but there are nothing but just some selfish thoughts. I writing some wishes here.

BACK ONCE AGAIN!

I'm back blogging once again. There was a lot of dispute over me blogging last time that I stopped blogging. After a year and I'm back blogging again. Alright, not sure whether will I blog frequently but I will try. This new blog is kinda of simple but it's ok, keeping everything simple in life is a good way of looking at things.

Alright. So this is my first post of the year. See ya!

P.S: Have a short debate with her but I guess I will try to humor her.