When I see him, I feel so bad. Feel so so bad and it just seems like everyone is plotting something against him and he is the only one that is unknown about everything. It's not like he is totally that bad, he is always there when we need him but why does things have to turn out this way? I have to urge to tell him everything. I know how it feels to have everyone being normal to him and when he is not there they were plotting or planning something. I want to tell him but somehow I just can't. I just can't bring myself to say it out.
Looking at him, still showing concern to us really make me feel guilty of not telling him. But for some reason I just can't. It's just like you are looking left and right simultaneously. I just have the feeling that I am betraying him. Why is it that nobody cares?
I wish I would have someone who can guard me, someone like Athena guiding her daughter Annabeth or Poseidon guiding his son Percy. I wish I have the oracle here to tell me the prophecy. What should I do? I'm just trapped in the middle.
I wish I have a device to change people's mind. What can I do? What should I do?
Another emptiness feeling. Filling up. I guess 2/3 of my heart is empty now. Who is going to take away the remaining 1/3?
I guess I can't sleep again tonight. Who can I turn to? There's no one I can trust now. Even the only one is already sleeping.
May god bless me. Bless him. Bless everyone I love.
I going to try turning in now. Don't really feel good now. I just want all my happiness back. All! Everything!!!!
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