~~~

Hais... Woke up with a very vex feeling again. Why is this so? Tomorrow is my birthday but no seems to have anything to look forward towards. Why do I have so many thing to think of? Why do I have to consider so much factors? Why is it that even though I know what is the result and I'm still insist on trying?

Dont have anything that I want now, how I wish that tomorrow there will be a big box outside my house and she's inside. I was thinking that it's stupid but right now this is what I want.

I need some confidence boost. Just someone that will give me words of courage and encourage me to march forward.

There are so many thing in my mind now. So many things that it's choking up my brain and not allowing it to think about other stuffs.

Trying to let go but at the same time holding on to it. Today she went to batam, knowing that make me miss her. I know I'm not suppose to but how? Can I do it? I'm worried that she will have sea sick because the weather. I'm worried about her being sick over there because it's not that hygiene. I want to stop all those thoughts but I cant.

If birthday wish are really come true, then the only wish this year is Wishing that she will come back to me.

All I want for birthday this year is you